Parent-Teacher Meeting: 30 Questions to Ask and How to Prepare

Key points

Most parent-teacher meetings (PTMs) last only 5 to 10 minutes per parent, so prepare your top three questions in advance.
Ask about behaviour, friendships and wellbeing, not only marks. Teachers often notice things at school that parents never see at home.
Bring your child's report card, a short list of questions and something to write with.
If there is a problem, describe what you have seen, listen to the teacher's view and agree on one or two clear next steps.
Follow up within two to four weeks to check whether the plan is working.

A parent-teacher meeting is one of the few times you can speak directly with the person who spends five or six hours a day with your child. Yet many parents walk out of a PTM having heard only "He is good but talks in class" or "She needs to improve in maths", and with no clear idea of what to do next.

This guide shows you how to prepare before the meeting, what to ask during it, and how to follow up after it. It also includes 30 questions grouped by topic. You will not have time to ask all 30. Pick the ones that matter most for your child.

Before the meeting

Talk to your child first. Ask simple, open questions a day or two before: "What do you enjoy most in class?", "Which subject feels hard right now?", "Is there anything you want me to ask your teacher?" Children often share more when they know you are on their side.
Look at recent work. Check notebooks, test papers and the report card. Note any patterns, such as careless mistakes, incomplete work or a sudden drop in one subject.
Write down your top three questions. Put the most important one first, in case time runs out.
Note anything the teacher should know. A new sibling, a house move, an illness, a death in the family or a change in sleep can all affect a child's behaviour at school.
Plan your time. Arrive on time. If both parents cannot come, decide who will go and share notes afterwards.

Tip: If you need more than ten minutes, for example to discuss a learning difficulty or bullying, ask the class teacher for a separate appointment. A busy PTM day is not the right time for a long, sensitive conversation.

30 questions to ask, grouped by topic

Academics and learning

How is my child doing compared with what is expected for this class?
Which subject or topic is my child strongest in?
Where is my child finding it hardest, and why do you think that is?
Does my child understand concepts, or mainly memorise answers?
How well does my child read and write for their age?
What can we do at home to support what you are teaching in class?
Are there any upcoming topics or tests we should prepare for?

Classroom behaviour and participation

Does my child pay attention and follow instructions?
Does my child ask questions or take part in class discussions?
How does my child respond when they get something wrong?
Have you noticed any behaviour that concerns you?
Does my child respect classroom rules and other students?
How is my child's attendance and punctuality?

Friendships and social life

Who does my child usually sit with or play with?
Does my child get along with other children? Are there any conflicts?
Does my child seem left out or alone at break time?
How does my child behave in group work?
Have you seen any signs of teasing or bullying, either by my child or towards my child?

Wellbeing and confidence

Does my child seem happy and settled at school?
Have you noticed any changes in mood or energy recently?
Does my child seem worried or stressed before tests? (See our guide on exam stress tips for students.)
Is my child comfortable asking for help?
Does my child eat lunch and drink water during the day?
Is there any activity, club or sport you think would suit my child?

Homework and routines

How much time should homework take each day at this level?
Is my child completing homework on time and to a good standard?
Should my child be doing homework alone, or is some help from us fine?
Is my child bringing the right books and materials each day?
How can we best contact you if we have a concern between meetings?
What is one thing we should focus on at home before the next PTM?

Question 30 is often the most useful. It turns the meeting into a clear action. For help building a calm daily study routine, read our guide on the homework routine for kids.

Choosing questions by age

Stage	Focus areas	Good questions to start with
Pre-primary (Nursery to UKG)	Settling in, independence, speech, fine motor skills	Questions 19, 15, 8, 23
Primary (Class 1 to 5)	Reading, writing, basic maths, friendships	Questions 5, 3, 16, 26
Middle (Class 6 to 8)	Concepts, organisation, peer pressure	Questions 4, 28, 18, 20
Secondary (Class 9 and 10)	Board exam readiness, stress, study habits	Questions 1, 7, 21, 30

During the meeting

Start positively. Thank the teacher and mention something your child enjoys in their class. This sets a friendly tone.
Listen more than you speak. Let the teacher share their view first, then ask your questions.
Ask for examples. If the teacher says "careless", ask "Can you show me an example?" Seeing the actual notebook or test paper helps you understand.
Take short notes. Write down the two or three main points and any action you agree on.
Do not compare. Avoid questions like "Why did her friend get more marks?" Focus on your child's own progress.
End with a plan. Before leaving, repeat what you understood: "So we will practise reading for 15 minutes daily, and you will move him to the front row. We will check again in three weeks."

How to discuss a problem constructively

Sometimes you go to a PTM with a real concern: low marks, a complaint about another child, or worry that a teacher is too harsh. These conversations go better when you follow a calm structure.

Describe what you have seen, not what you assume. Say "For the last two weeks she has cried before school and says no one plays with her", rather than "The children in this class are bullying my daughter."
Ask what the teacher has noticed. "Have you seen anything like this at school?" The teacher may have important information you do not have.
Agree on the goal. You both want the child to learn and feel safe. Saying this out loud helps.
Decide on one or two clear actions. For example: the teacher will watch break time this week; you will talk to your child at home; you will meet again in ten days.
Escalate politely if needed. If nothing changes after the agreed time, ask to meet the class coordinator or principal. Bring your notes and dates.

Tip: If your concern is about a teacher's own behaviour, such as physical punishment or humiliation, raise it directly with the principal or management in writing rather than in a crowded PTM room. Corporal punishment is prohibited in Indian schools under the Right to Education Act.

After the meeting

Talk to your child the same day. Share the good things first. Then explain the one or two areas to work on, without scolding. "Your teacher says you are very helpful in class. She also says reading aloud will help you, so let us do that together after dinner."
Put the plan into action. If you agreed on daily reading practice, put it on a simple timetable. Our study timetable guide can help.
Keep a short record. Note the date, what was discussed and what was agreed. This helps at the next PTM.
Check in after two to four weeks. Send a short, polite message or note to the teacher asking whether they see any change. Keep it brief and respectful of their time.
Notice and praise progress. Even small improvements deserve recognition. This keeps your child motivated.

Many schools now share attendance, marks and notices through a parent app, which makes it easier to track progress between meetings. Use it as a conversation starter with your child and the teacher, not as a replacement for talking.

Frequently asked questions

Should I take my child to the parent-teacher meeting?

It depends on the school and the child's age. Older children (Class 6 and above) often benefit from hearing feedback directly and taking part in the plan. If you need to discuss something sensitive, ask to speak to the teacher alone for a few minutes first.

What if I cannot attend the PTM?

Inform the class teacher in advance and ask for another time, a phone call or a short written update. Most teachers are happy to arrange this if asked politely.

How do I respond if the teacher only gives negative feedback?

Stay calm and ask, "What is one thing my child is doing well?" and "What is the most important thing to work on first?" This helps you get balanced feedback and a clear starting point.

Is it okay to disagree with the teacher?

Yes, as long as you do it respectfully. Share what you see at home, ask for examples and look for a solution together. Disagreement handled politely often leads to a better understanding of your child.

How often should I contact the teacher outside PTMs?

Only when there is a real need, such as a health issue, a family change or a concern that cannot wait. Use the school's preferred method (diary, app or office) and keep messages short.